Before the pastor’s reassurance of our heavenly Father’s concern, I had never felt loved by God wondering why He didn’t protect me when I needed His help most. I didn’t realize God cared and understood the pain I felt as a frightened child living in an alcoholic home afraid to sleep at night. This supernatural knowledge changed my perception of our Creator. A pastor visited me there and explained, “What happened to you as a child, hurt God more than it hurt you.” Instead of fulfilling this dire prophecy, over three decades ago, I found emotional and spiritual healing on a psychiatric ward the last time I had to be hospitalized. Back then, little had been accomplished in mental health reform, and the hospital was a barbaric place not offering any real hope for recovery.Īs the years passed, following a couple more serious suicide attempts, an ongoing battle with addiction, along with intermittent and lengthy hospitalizations, a psychiatrist in charge of my case said I would probably die by suicide or in a mental institution. Months later, I would spend much of my senior year in Toledo State Mental Hospital. I recovered physically, but not emotionally. Only a high school junior, my hopeless and unstable environment resulted in the near fatal, intentional drug overdose, which landed me in an Intensive Care Unit hovering between life and death. My story begins during the 1970s, when as a depressed teenager living in a dysfunctional home I attempted suicide. I agreed to be interviewed for her project. It was during the late 1990s, when Ginger Stache, my former supervisor, who is an award-winning journalist, decided to create awareness about suicide by producing a documentary. Despite this, with the catalyst of educating others, I started to tell my story publicly while working as a reporter and producer at Lima’s WTLW TV 44. Yet sharing about a mental health struggle can feel shameful and frightening.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesCategories |